Thursday, May 20, 2010

In the Lord's time

For all of you that know me, you know that i have NO patience for things i want in life. 
You would think i would have got this concept of "In the Lord's time" not mine getting married at 26, finishing college at 27 and  deciding to start a family much older than most of my friends. 
Being the impatient person i am, i tend to get frustrated when things do not go the way I planned on, or when i think they should. I was reading a friends blog last week and read an amazing poem. 
I felt so close to the Lord and knew things i desire in life (like starting a family, finishing school, getting a job) will happen when the Lord knows I will be able to handle it. I am so grateful for my amazing friends and their testimonies in the Gospel. They have strengthened  my testimony and even though they may not know it, they have had a HUGE impact in my life.. This is a poem that will stay close to my heart. Things may not happen with the timing i think they should. However, the Lord knows me better than i know myself so "In the Lord's time" is ok with me..
     Wait.....
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried:
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, 'Child, you must wait'.
'Wait? You say, wait! ' my indignant reply. 
'Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By Faith, I have asked, and am claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I can relate
hangs in the balance, and YOU tell me to WAIT?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
or even a 'no' to which I can resign.
And Lord, You promised that if we believe
we need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply!
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, 'You must wait.'
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
and grumbled to God, 'So, I'm waiting.... for what?'
He seemed, then, to kneel, and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, 'I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want But, you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there;
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.
You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save.... (for a start),
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have LAST.
You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for Thee.'
Yes, your dreams for your loved one overnight would come true,
But, Oh, the Loss! If I lost what I'm doing in you!
So, be silent, My Child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft' may My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, 'WAIT.'

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Happy Birthday Jared

If you have not noticed i am pretty in love with this kid.. Jared is my everything and i am head over heels in love. Today is his birthday and we are off doing our own things we do on Tuesdays, i am in class all day and he is at work. However, i think this birthday has to be better than his birthday last year. At this time last year i was so stressed with a wedding that was coming in 5 days that i almost forgot his birthday.. I have tried to be better this year. We went to Tucano's for dinner on saturday and we are going out for our anniversary this friday (anniversary is on the 23rd).. Jared i love you and can not wait for more birthdays to come.. I hope you have a great day and know you are the best thing that has ever happened to me!!